By Zak Weinberg:
To take a stance against the legalization of marijuana, in Isla Vista, is social suicide. Seriously, at the climax of a fiery legalization debate, friendships are tested, while in super slow mo’ fists fly and stoners’ favorite classic gaming consoles crumble (past the point of the blow in the cartridge trick-a-roo), and as legend has it, in the heat of an angry discussion a man put his friend into a vegetative coma with a swift bong bludgeoning to the head – all because he said pot should maintain it’s illicit status.
But, Ole Today, in bold and beautiful fashion, constructed a holy list of worthy reasons to keep pot illegal. So set down your bong, piece, joint, blunt, apple, or beer can, grab a cup of purple drank, cool aid, or just plain water, and enjoy. (And for Christ’s sake, no bong bludgeoning!)
1. There’s a lot of pontificating pot puffers who claim the legalization of Marijuana will launch an entire industry, creating millions of joint-rolling dream jobs, all while stimulating a slow economy. Although those pot puffers might be on to something, they failed to notice one thing:
According to Jeffery Miron, a Harvard Professor of Economics, there is a 14 billion dollar economy behind marijuana.
He purports, the government could save $7.7 billion a year if it didn’t have to spend money regulating pot activity. Also, the federal government would gain 6.2 billion if they taxed marijuana at a comparable rate to cigarrettes and alchohol.
So why not?
First, the industrialization of pot, will bring about a heartless, faceless, lifeless, machine. In the same fashion as the tobacco industry, the marijuana industry will work to mass produce a product and increase profitability at any cost. That means manipulating the high quality green we love to smoke, into a cheaper, lower quality, more addictive, product that we need to smoke.
The ritualistic pass-to-the-right-ceremonial-baked-of-your-mind-dorm-smoking will die, and a new era of I-need-a-smoke will be born. Weed will be packaged, marketed, and sold in a way that increases sales. You think Wal-Mart is going to stock up on 20 sacks and 8ths, or is the industry more likely to develop a product you’ll pick up before work, at the supermarket, or even the gas station?
Right now, we are in control of a gift called marijuana, and you want to fork it over to the man, for purely monetary simulation purposes!?
You deserve a bong bludgeoning.
2. There is no such thing as a high functioning pot head:
That’s right. I’ve seen too many people forget how to use a microwave, turn on a Nintendo, and even speak properly to believe weed doesn’t have deleterious effects on the human body and brain.
Didn’t you hear what Jimmy Hendrix did to the national anthem at Woodstock? (Although Jimmy was experiencing synergistic affects of countless drugs . . . which reminds me, Are You Experienced?)
And how about Peter and Lous Griffin at the Quahog Talent Show?
Also, although stores like Costco and Sam’s Club would thrive, the stores would embody a strange zombie movie, with free sample lines longer than Disneyland’s Space Mountain.
America is already an entirely distracted country. With television, fast cars, sports about fast cars, ipods, and video games, there is no time for reflection or pure human interaction. The expanded use of marijuana will further contribute to an already too individualistic estranged society.
3. Exploitative uses:
America is infamous for exploiting weaker cultures, countries, and markets, in order to turn a profit. Industries turn a machine like cheek to morality, and do what it takes to one up the competition. The point is, weed, can be manipulated into a drug used for social retardation. The same way alcohol cripples pieces of Eastern Europe, and even American communities, and the same way amphetamines plague destitute America, weed will find its place in social deterioration. Ultimately, how can a culture conquer the quest for the American dream, when they’re on drugs being sold to them by the gate-keepers of that very dream?
Check out the response on Three Reasons Why Pot Should Stay Illegal Part II
For something related check out Ole Today’s: Adderall UCSB’s Favorite Study Drug
For something entirely random visit Ole Today’s: Give Her Head
is this a joke?
yah dude this is a fucking joke they spelled jimi hendrix wrong and all those dumb excuses are retarded they suck and they dont make any freaking sense
What? These reasons don’t make sense at all… must be a joke.
cool.
I enjoyed the read but if you smoke marijuana and find that you are becoming tired and de motivated and you do not want to quit using marijuana. Try vaporizing your marijuana and you will get more a of a clean headed high buzz.
Like tobacco, marijuana smoke contains toxins that are known to be hazardous to the respiratory system. Among them are the highly carcinogenic polynuclear aromatic hydrocarbons, a prime suspect in cigarette-related cancers. These toxins are essentially a byproduct of combustion, separate from the pharmaceutically active components of marijuana, known as cannabinoids, which include THC. When you burn marijuana it produces quite a lot of tar. Pipes and joints generally do not have proper filters. Bongs are not the answer, because you inhale concentrated smoke.
The vaporizer certainly reduces the level of tar. You will not have to worry about the harmful carcinogens your body is absorbing when you inhale marijuana smoke.
I will suggest 2 places that I use the first one is Legal Bud!
The second suggestion I have is Gass City!
Hello
baserdasew
The chemicals that house inside the human brain sometimes run out of control and tend to become unbalanced, which as a result leads to such stress related problems.
This drug is popular for its feature that helps people to get rid off unwanted tension, nervousness, and anxiety.
This is because drinking alcohol normally tends to lower the level of your blood pressure and also decrease your breathing rate as long as you?re out of consciousness.
how about cause it makes people fucking retarded
wow these reasons suck, do some research dumb fuck
This is fucking stupid.
MEDICAL FACTS: Marijuana is used for stress, anxiety, and tension relif.
It can be used to relieve, lesson, or get rid of pain from Migrains, heahaches, AIDs, Cancer, backpain, muscle pain, and the list gooooooeeeessss ooooon. It can be used to help people with depression as well. It is an alternative recource to wood as it is used for paper, cloth, rope, and alternative fuel. This can also GREATLY reduce deforestation! There has NEVER been a reported overdose and case of cancer directly linked back to Marijuana use. Why dont you read up on your facts douche bag. -.-
Hello!
yep… thats why im a pot head.. currently attending med school to become a radiologist…. make straigh A’s biatch.. I’m on point and smoking marijuana does not hold me back one bit.
Very nice site!
Why is this on “Top Content of Last Week . . .” when it’s over a month old?
HA this guy grows weed, okay so first off marijuana is the shit, second off if anyone industrialized marijuana and reduced everything everyone would say fuck that and grow their own.. i mean seriously look at how the medical situation goes it is the only medicine that isn’t really regulated by the government. i like the way its headed medical use and personal growers eventually hopefully just conventional use and a cultivation license then that of industrial hemp. either way it is probably going to be legalized nationally (at least medically and industrial hemp) as soon medical marijuana reaches the east coast so jump on board and grow yourself if you’re worried about any of that over all…. get your medical licenses all of you.
i know three reasons why you shouldn’t play soccer in the kitchen
sweet
Thanks, very good.
Ok so what if it is a gate way drug. who cares if somebody wants to fuck up their life cause they feel the need to be stupid let them. But weed should not get a bad rep just cause of that. My Aunt Lynn was diagnosed with Cancer and when she was on her death bed you won’t believe wat they gave her. WEED!! it helped her pass more comfortably most people need weed to sooth pains and help get over nervousness. i need cause i am to stressed out all the time. So there is my debate. Peace.
So you’re telling me you don’t have the strength of will to chill yourself out? You need extra chemicals to do that? I seriously doubt “Most people need weed”. It’s just a tool that weak people use to do what the rest of us do on our own: DEAL WITH LIFE!
It is a gateway drug, a gateway straight into a bag of cheetos hahaha
oKsOcsBO Valium
what stoners do with their life is their buisness, so get over urself and worry about world hunger, not weed
letting go the tobacco dependence…?
Absolutely asinine.
MBvPzTww Ambien
You Dumbass All Of This is Bullshit Learn Your Fact Weed isn’t as bad as the goverment makes it seem and I hope that someday the goverment will tell the truth and everyone who thot they knew about weed and that it can “kill you” is gonna look pretty fucking stupid
Fact.
if you smoke a joint its equal to you smoking a pack of cigs. so whats that to say for the person that smokes 3 joints a day AND a pack of cigs?? your gonna die. very painfully. oh and you will shit your self non stop on your death bed…
You mean 1 UNFILTERED joint is equivalent to about 2.5- FILTERED cigarrettes. PS there’s many more ways to get high off of cannabis than smoking it.
I’ve happened to be becoming all stressed and spaced out these days upon smoking some potent pot in recent months…
Any of you dealing with this? Maybe I simply just have to minimize the amount I am smoking right…?
This guy is totally right, as someone with a med card I DO NOT want weed legalized there gonna tax the shit out of it, and by making it legal your taking out the secludedness marijuana has. Its already legal for me, so why the F*ck would i want it to be legal for EVERYONE?
Zak,
So even is weed is taken to the next level, the hardcore weed fans will still be hardcore weed fans. If someone grows their own shit now, whats going to make them stop growing their own shit later on. Good weed is good weed and bad weed is bad weed; so make good weed and fuck the bad weed.
yes, stoners can sometimes be called lazy and dont get anything done (frat boys who smoke weed), but i know a good amount of people who can live their lives and smoke on the side. You cant call the entire population of stoners lazy.
Weed is such a mellow drug. If you really think legalizing weed is going to in the end screw everything up you are fucking crazy. Alcohol and tobacco are way worse drugs for you body, not to mention all those others who take addy to study. Weed is green. It grows from the ground. Fuck what big companies can do, today, i will smoke home grown weed and tomorrow i have no plans on changing that.
Zak, go smoke a joint a relax.
-ZigZag
Can anyone tell me why Marijuana has a Mexican (or Spanish name)??? It doesn’t come from Mexico. In fact It actually comes from Asia or the middle east and was considered a type of tobacco for thousands of years. So why does it have a Spanish name. 70 years ago when marijuana was made illegal, racism was vary common and out in the open. So they gave this plant a Spanish name to rely on that racism to make it illegal.
http://www.drugwarrant.com/articles/why-is-marijuana-illegal/
I have read many newspaper articles from that era that refer to marijuana in way that you would never think of.
“Marijuana makes black people think there as good as white people.” or “marijuana makes black people look twice at a white woman.” Today we think of that as flat out crazy but those were some of the arguments that was used to gain support for an anti-marijuana movement.
Times have changed but people are still coming up with stupid reasons to keep it illegal that in my opinion are no better than the originals.
Nice post, thanks for writing!
hey u fuckin idiot, im a happy healthy, straight A student who plays basketball better than half the team and i smoke and 1/8 a day, so quit makin up a bunch of stupid bullshit facts retard, its none of ur business if we wanna smoke, or ur right to say other wise, so how bout u work for a real cause douche bag
Yes, stop using Marijuana because of the cartoon Family Guy.
please….
Dude, i am a stoner doctor
Hows It Going
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Everything about this is just so dumb, how will industry be hurt? People will still have the need for other things, hell it might hurt tobacco sales as kids should also be urged into smoking pot instead of tobacco, but thats hurting a industry killing MILLIONS a year. So there we go saving lives possibly! Wait it’ll make a lot less drug trafficing deaths so there you go, thats another 40k lives saved every few years.
Second) You obv have never been around seen smelt or known somone who smokes pot.. Ok I had trouble running a microwave once stoned out of my mind, ran it, took me 20 seconds longer than it would have if I was not high, but i’ve not been able to run it drunk, and ran it perfect after that, while high is really not a valid reason to talk about though because it is non aggresive and if not told so horrible would have much less freak attacks and we would have warning labels :If paniced go to sleep:
3. Do not compare weed to alcohol unless you say they both intoxicate you. That’s all they have in common and weed actually will help people get along, you wouldn’t know you havn’t been high or seen marijuana in real life but when if you stone with somone you ill go so far as to say HATE, you get along much better while high, and one of my good friends I used to totaly hate untill we wen’t to a party and both got stoned